Wednesday 19 August 2009

UK Home Repossessions Ease – Que?

The number of homes repossessed in the UK fell 12:83% in the second quarter of 2009 compared with the previous three months, according to propaganda being spread by traditional High Street banksters and building society lenders - since most folks have been evicted and no longer enjoy the comfort and false security of four walls around them and a bit of a roof over their heads.

Conversely the 11,417 homes repossessed was a rise of 14:27% compared with the same period the previous year but the number of repossession orders granted by heartless scumbag judges rose over the same period, up 16% to 19,123 - Mr. Shylock Weaselberg, spokesman for the Council of Loan Sharks and Rip-off Merchants informed the Usury Gazette.

So much for comparative figures, amounts and percentages which mean absolutely zilch when you’re unemployed and living in a rented dog kennel on an urban canal bank with no en suite bathroom facilities or internet connection.

While the Government has prattled on about a number of schemes to try to help people struggling with mortgage repayments to stay in their home most of these initiatives are in the evolving stages – and still being talked about in typical New Labour’s foot-dragging fashion while a further crisis looms in the immediate future.

Homeless charity Shit-or-Bust has warned of a dead certain second wave of home repossessions when interest rates go up again. It further claims that rising unemployment and short time hours would also add to the risk of homeowners being unable to make their regular mortgage repayments in the coming months

The latest figures show only 14 households have so far been accepted on to the Mortgage Rescue Scheme, under which people are coerced sell their home to a Rothshite bankster-owned housing association and lease it back again – for a rent that nigh on equals their original mortgage repayments.

This will eventually re-create a nation of tenants and wholly obliterate the status of mid-income ‘house owner’ and thus the entire middle class – which was invented a century ago by agents of the landed gentry / aristocracy to avoid further blood-letting decimation of their ranks through French and Russian style revolutions.

Thus the middle class became the buffer between the so-called aristocratic nobility (royal spongers) and the poverty-stricken landless peasant working classes.

Conversely when both the middle and lower unemployed non-working classes are forced embarrassingly together – living in tents, internet cafes, under bridges or their cars – with the wife, two kids, the mother-in-law – and her effin’ dog – then something is going to reach a critical mass and go ‘snap!’ with a large ‘S’ initiating a chain reaction of mega-nuclear proportions.

However Business Secretary Lord Peter Scandalson, a bloke who has turned risk avoidance into an artform and is always the first to conjure self-preservation initiatives, has this week concocted a raft of desperate Chinese fire drill government schemes – including imposing martial law - to stave off a nation-wide revolution that could well decimate the current corrupt banking, political and government civil service structures – including Freemasonry - responsible for the economic chaos.

Disaffected Labour back benchers have leaked information to the Sunday Shitraker that with the recession crisis deepening it is being contemplated by Brown’s hapless government to accept Scandalson’s recommendations and actually go ahead and loose the intended Autumn spread of the new Sneezy Pig swine flu virus a couple of months early – like NOW – to distract a rebellious public from their unemployed homeless plight by presenting them with a genocidal flu pandemic to contend with before the entire population goes ballistic.

Are you a homeowner who is facing repossession? Did you get a ‘sorry for fucking up the economy’ apology letter from Gordon Brown? Have you claimed your free family-sized weatherproof cardboard box to live in yet? Are you aware that possession used to be nine-tenths of the Law? Could your local council fuck up a perfectly good anvil?

Send us your comments and experiences using the online form below and you could win the freehold to a patch of alley or a bridge arch squat with a prestigious City centre postal code.

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