Sunday 2 November 2014

Con-Dems Push for Hammurabic Law Change

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

The government is planning to scrap the use of police cautions in England and Wales for those who commit minor offences such as child molesting and violent rape, which are currently slapped with a formal 'tut-tut / naughty' warning if the culprit is a member of the House of Lords or an MP - whereas up in semi-devolved bonny Nonceland kiddie fiddling is considered a social norm by the judiciary's Magic Circle pederasts - and only those who would dare expose such scandalous sexual assaults on children by the establishment's Satanist elite are arrested and imprisoned.

Speaking outside the House of Conmans on Friday, the Nasty Party's Injustice Minister, Chris 'Homophobe' Graything, informed one gutter press hack from the Lex Talionis Gazette that in light of the current historic paedo inquiry brouhaha regarding conflict of interest appointments to head the probe, then child sexual abuse victims should not feel those guilty of acts of pederasty are walking away 'scot-free' (sic).
Under the new system, which will cover all minor crimes - including arson and murder - offenders will be mandated to make good damage they have done or pay compensation from their Jobseekers Allowance.
Those who commit more serious offences - such as MI5's Muslim stooges perpetrating acts of domestic terrorism - would face court if they failed to comply with the 'and don't do it again' warning conditions set out by their local Plod Squad.

Graything, the Tory MP for Epsom Salts (and former turncoat member of the Social Democrat Losers Party) claimed "It isn't right that the criminal elements of our society - and now I'm referring to the common herd rabble and not Parliamentarians or the BBC's celebrity DJ paedos - who commit offences can be dealt with by little more than a slap on the wrist warning."
"Our introduction of this new Hammurabic Code 'eye for an eye' penalty system will empower victims to get their own back on the offenders - and as the credo goes 'revenge is a meal best savoured cold."

"The more serious crimes might be dealt with by a suspended prosecution which would have one or more conditions attached, for example paying a fine, or in the case of serial killers, attending a rehabilitation course. While the Vigilante community policing system and street corner lynchings have been partial success in cutting crime around Broken Britain's sink or swim social housing estates, this new system of mine is designed to provide victims with a sense of closure and empowerment."

"For instance we want the punishment to fit the crime - thus the likes of rapists get the tables turned on them and bonked up the arse by some butch dyke policewoman wearing a twelve inch strapon dildo - and victims of child sexual molestation will be encouraged to kick their abusers in the bollocks several times or have the option of seeing their molesters castrated."

Conversely Bev Titwank, spokeswoman for Twat-Watch, the government abuse sentinel charity, had this to say to media hacks. "Wot the fuck is goin' on, I asks yer. We've bin lumbered wiv a gay-bashin' justice minister wiv zero legal trainin' - an' not much common sense either when he sunk inter his trademark nasty bastard pit bull attack dog mode an' referred ter Greater Manchester's Moss Side as 'Gollyville' an' a veritable gun crime war zone cos he said it reminded him of some dumb-arsed American cops an' robbers programme on the telly."

"Graything's yet another typical Tory Party expense-fiddlin' sleazebag wiv an exaggerated sense of entitlement an' abuses political privilege wiv impunity. Our political, justice an' penal systems are in total disarray thanks ter the corrupt likes of the Tony Bliar-led New Labour - wot turned out ter be fuckin' worse than Old Labour - an' since 2010 this shower of coalition shites under Cabbage Patch Dave's mismanagement command. This cautions culture all comes down ter justice on the cheap - ter do away wiv legal aid an' prison costs."

"It's not only long past time they started ter hear the people's shouts of Foul when they vent their spleen but ter start listenin' as well - and take fuckin' notice before we all kick off big time an' overturn the entire corruption-ridden establishment an' have a fresh start from the socks up. Scrap the Shitehall an' local authority civil service bureaucracies an' this Crapitalis money system - an' the parasitic joke of a monarchy - an' our hereditary nobility House of Lords joke wot's bin thrust on us since the Norman conquest - an' before."

"Let's see a return of scumbags gettin' pilloried an' public lashin's an' trial by fire - an' bring back the duckin' stool while we're at it. An' how about some of them Sharia Law penalties fer petty theft like shopliftin' from any of the ubiquitous Greedy Grocer supermarkets like Pestco or Pukesburys or Shiterose or Mammon & Snobfords - an' the offendin' scally gets their hand chopped off."

Thought for the day. So what's to be the penalty for a first offence domestic terrorist attacks? A 1,000 hour community service order polishing boots at a local army barracks - or get shot in the back at Canary Wharf?

To close, fuck the Satanist Masonic secret handshake fraternity and Big Brother – and his sister – and the Moloch / Mammon worshipping architects of the New World Order .

Allergy warning: This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with wild rumour 'and' hard public interest factoids - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Carbon Credit Offset / Cap & Trade Exchange (aka Global Warming / Pollution Reduction Scam) declaration: No trees, fish, cormorants, bumble bees or small furry mammals - otters or voles – or Syrian refugees - were harmed in posting this insurrectionist epistle. However, a large number of the GCHQ / Five Eyes Alliance’s Prism / Tempora / Carnivore / Echelon / X-Keyscore / SIG-INT I-Spy super snooper ‘Nosy Bastard’ wire-tap / IMSI catchers / eavesdropping / data mining system’s network electrons on Hubble Bubble Road in Cheltenham were temporarily inconvenienced.

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